Action up your next laser skirmish game with these movie one-liners


For both adults and children, M9 Laser Skirmish is the perfect situation to immerse yourself in a world of fast-paced combat without the pain and sorrow of, say, paintball. Working as a team to outwit your opponents is a great exercise for a successful corporate party, not to mention a fun school holiday activity for the kids

When you strap on that vest, load up your weapon and dive into the battlefield, a thrilling way to spice things up is to pretend you are an action movie superstar. Consisting predominately of biceps and witticisms, action heroes are icons for generations to come. Want to be the next Arnie? Try using both of these set-ups and one-liners the next time you're jumping into combat. 

The good doctor

The set-up for this situation requires you to bring along a lab coat and anything else you think looks doctory - stethoscopes, surgical implements (blunted, obviously) etc. After you have entered the arena, position yourself near your teammates and prepare for the game to start. As it does so, bulge those muscles of yours, raise your weapon to cock it and growl, "It's time to give these punks some laser surgery," in your deepest, gravelliest of tones. Now you're ready to win. 

The lesson

For this setup, bring your best army tank top or torn black shirt. You need to look like you've been through hell and back, survived at least three different mass fire fights and dodged no fewer than four grenades. Now duck, dive, sprint and combat roll you way through the battlefield until you manage to sneak up on one of your unsuspecting opponents. As they are looking the other way, press the barrel of your weapon into the back of their head (or vest, if you actually want to score a point) and get into their ear to say, "Didn't your mother ever tell you not to be lasey?" Pull that trigger - you're awesome. 

Got some fantastic one-liners of your own? Share them with us in the comments below!