How to bowl like it’s 1999

Being an adult can be hellishly wearing at times: there’s the bills, endless family responsibilities and, of course, the 9-5 (as a minimum) grind. It’s only natural then that we sometimes dream of slipping back to an age when the care-factor could actually be zero and we didn’t give a fig for what other people thought. Well, if you’re itching to get back in touch with that inner child, we have the answer. Bowling. 

Here are the steps you need to take to get back in touch with that bright-eyed, bushy tailed version of yourself who’s trapped behind that stress hernia. 

Relax. No, properly
The first thing to realise is that nobody’s watching you, and nobody’s judging you. Everyone else is here for the same reason – to have fun.  So it’s time to shed that serious, grown-up skin you’ve somehow built up like plaque over the years. Shake it off like Taylor Swift and get ready for some fun!

Load up on treats
Look in your wallet or purse. Look at the food and drink menu. Imagine you’re your 10-year-old self. What would you order, if nobody was there to stop you? Do that. 

Blow off some steam in the arcade
There are plenty of games in ZONE BOWLING’s arcades to test your mettle, and part of reconnecting with that inner kid is developing a Jedi-like focus on beating your PB and walking out with a stuffed fluffy toy for you to cuddle. Alternatively, it’s moving from machine to machine like a Tassie Devil, sucking at all of them but having way too much fun to care. Both equally good options. 

When you’re bowling, pick a funny name 
We’re not saying Geoff isn’t a funny name, but you can do better, Geoffrey. There’s nothing funnier than calling yourself “POOHEAD” where everyone can see it on the big screen, unless it’s calling your mate “POOHEAD” when he isn’t looking. Just watch Nanna doesn’t catch you!

Celebrate your strikes
When you were little and knocked over every man jack of those pins, you’d spin on your heel with clenched fists of triumph while your adult opponents pretended to be happy you’d just beat them. Get back in that headspace – and if you think you’ve outgrown the gloating joy of racking up points, try watching soccer players after they score a goal. 

Bowl It Off! 
By now, you should have heartily embraced the Bowl It Off philosophy, which means you’ve said goodbye to silly ideas of “being an adult” and “getting a good night’s sleep before work tomorrow”. How much fun is it? Picture your younger self in the middle distance, smiling, nodding and giving you a thumbs-up as a lone tear rolls down your cheek.  

Once you've locked all that in, it's time to find your nearest ZONE BOWLING venue and book your next celebration occasions, as it is sure to be a hit!