Bowling 101 for Dummies

Split Happens!

Involuntary splits and flying bowling “heads” might sound hilarious – until they’re happening to you. Learn the dos and don’ts of the bowling lanes with the help of this hilarious bowling fails compilation! (Special mention to some of our favourite bowling moments in movies!)

Bowling 101 for Dummies

This hilarious bowling fails compilation by the guys from America’s Funniest Home Videos encapsulates everything you shouldn’t do when taking a turn on the lanes. Don’t step over the line. Don’t kick the ball. Don’t step over the line. Don’t choose a ball that’s too big – or too small – for you (and your fingers). Don’t step over the line! Watch and learn, first-time bowling Padawans!

What Bowling Movies have Taught us…

There have been some iconic bowling movies and TV scenes through the ages, and each one taught us something about the spirit of bowling. We round up some of our favourites below.

The Big Lebowski (1998)

Do:
- Pitch up when you say you will.
- Support your team no matter what.
- Leave any weapons at home. Please.
- Abide and play a while – all the cool Dudes do.

Don’t:
- Lick the ball. Please. The character of Jesus Quintana scarred us for life when he did that. Just don’t do it. It doesn’t taste like liquorice.
- Step over the foul line. Bad things happen, man.

Men in Black III (2012)

Do:
- Keep your bowling lane area clean and neat. Keep food off the lanes – we spend so much time buffing those…
- Clean your ball using a nifty cleaning cloth – it helps to remove grease and slick stains, especially if you’ve just wolfed down a hot dog before you took your turn.

Don’t:
- Roll anything other than an actual bowling ball down the lanes. Using someone’s head just doesn’t lead to the smooth glide you need to strike at your pins. Also, substituting nostrils for bowling ball finger holes is just gross, man. Somebody needs to tell that to Agent K and Agent J. Just watch here.

Malcolm in the Middle

Look, we love this popular TV series. But just everything about this scene is a no. It did make us giggle, though (watch here). Serves Malcolm right…

So, don’t:
- Throw a temper tantrum – unattractive look, man.
- Cross over the foul line and walk on the surface of the lane. Seriously, we don’t know how Malcolm stayed upright. He should have cracked his head open.
- Shove the ball every which way. It’s not a good look and you still fail.

Critters (1986)

This is one of those silly-but-awesome horror movies from the 80s we can’t helploving – and the bowling scene is a special little cautionary tale for overenthusiastic bowlers.

Do:
- Take your time to figure out your bowling style. Easy does it, and skill is better than speed.

Don’t:
- Flex your muscles to see how hard or how high you can throw the ball. Hamstring tears and damaged pins mean no more bowling, and that’s no fun for anyone.

Daddy’s Home 2 (2017)

We love this father/son bowling moment. Ultimately, going out for a game of ten pin bowling is about FUN. You share this time with friends, family and loved ones, so if all doesn’t go to plan bowling wise, don’t sweat it.

Do:
- Take the small wins.

Don’t:
- Give up. Remember: you got to try it to strike it!